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Dogasu's Backpack | Features | Pokémon Radio Show! The Rocket-Dan's Secret Empire
Vol. 06 of Pokémon Radio Show! The Rocket-Dan's Secret Empire was broadcast on July 29th, 2012 on 76.1 interFM in Tokyo, Japan. The episode came out between the airings of Pocket Monsters Best Wishes! Episodes 089 ("Iris and the Roughneck Kairyu") and 090 "The Curtain Rises on the Junior Cup! Kairyu vs. Tsunbear!!" Portions of the episode were later released on CD in 2013. 
A big thanks to Team Rocket Cheer Squad on Twitter for providing me with the images and other backups from the old @Pokemon_Radio Twitter account. 
The sketch starts off with a narration like the kind you'd hear in a commercial for a dramatic TV series. "In 2012, he'll be back. He can back a man into a corner with a single phone call. That's right! The Redial that turns evil on its head has returned!" 
A man waits for the call to connect.
Furui (Kojirou): "Um...Hello?"
Musashi: "Hello? May I ask who's speaking?"
Furui: "Um...can you tell me your name?"
Musashi: "Musashi. But you know I'm the one who asked first...what's your name, sir?"
Furui: "Um...my name is Furui."
Musashi: "Furui...?" A startled Musashi starts to whisper to herself. "A call from someone named Furui...they say he can back a man into a corner with a single phone call..." Musashi returns to speaking at a normal volume. "Um, I'm sorry but we're a bit busy at the moment. Please try again some other time!" 
Mr. Furui hits the Redial button. Musashi answers, pretending to be a voice mail recording:
Musashi: "Boo bee bee beep! We're sorry, the phone number you're trying to reach is no longer in service!"
Furui: "Ms. Musashi, is that you?"
Musashi: "Aw crap"
Furui: "This is Furui. I understand you're busy, but..."
Musashi: "Oh, um, let me transfer you to the person in charge here. Please stay on the line!"
We hear Nyarth trudge over to the phone, wondering what this sudden phone call's about.
Nyarth: "Yeah, what is it?"
Furui: "Um, can you tell me your name?"
Nyarth: "It's Nyarth. Who are ya Nya?"
Furui: "My name is Furui."
Nyarth: "Furui...?" Nyarth, like Musashi before him, starts to whisper to himself. "The Redial that turns evil on its head...that Furui? But I ain't done nyothing wrong Nya." Nyarth returns to speaking at a normal volume. "Mr. Furui, I think there's been some kind of mistake. Bye Nya-ra!"
Mr. Furui hits the Redial button again. Nyarth answers.
Nyarth: "What kind of prank are ya pullin' Nya? We ain't done nyothing wrong Nya!"
Furui: "Please listen to me, Mr. Nyarth..."
Nyarth: "I ain't got nyothing to say to you Nya!"
Mr. Furui hits the Redial button a third time. And a fourth time. And a fifth time. And a sixth time. Nyarth picks up the phone over and over, yelling things like "quit botherin' me Nya!" before slamming the phone down.
By the eighth phone call Nyarth is all worn out. "Alright alright, Mr. Furui. I give. I'll listen to whatever it is you have to say Nya. Just please stop calling us Nya!" Mr. Furui is relieved. "I'm happy to hear it. I understand you're busy. But...could you bring me an order of ramen? Just one will be fine."
A long silence lingers in the air...
"THIS AIN'T A RAMEN SHOP NYA!!"
With this, the Rocket trio ends the sketch by reciting the Hoenn version of their motto.
Welcome to Pokémon Radio Show! The Rocket-Dan's Secret Empire! After Musashi, Kojirou, and Nyarth introduce themselves they remind us that this radio show exists to meet the ambition of their Boss, Sakaki-sama, of recruiting all 7 billion people in the world into the Rocket-Dan. Musashi says that becoming a member is super easy; all you have to do is follow Sakaki-sama's Twitter account, @Pokemon_Radio. Once you do that you will become one of their comrades, Kojirou adds.
But enough of this chit-chat; Musashi cuts in to announce that it's time to get started with The 'Orders from Double-Q - Try These New Items Out Ahead of Time' Segment!! Nyarth wonders what in the world she's talking about -- they never start the show off with the Double-Q segment -- but Musashi replies that this is merely a continuation of last week. After all, they never got around to eating that ice cream, right? Kojirou and Nyarth both suppose she has a point but when they notice the staff scrambling around in the background they convince Musashi to just do the show in the order written out in their script. They've got their special guest waiting for them and everything!
So let's get this show started for real! The first segment is, of course, "Welcome, Pokémon Day Care Worker!" Each week they invite guests who work hard to raise Pokémon every single day into the Studio to talk about all the hard work they do. What kind of stories do they have to tell...? Let's get right into it!
But before that, a commercial!
The Battle Subway brothers Nobori (voiced by Kensuke Satou) and Kudari (voiced by Kiyotaka Furushima) talk about the Pokémon programming on the cable network Kids Station. The network will be airing a different Pocket Monsters movie every Sunday at 12:00 noon as part of their special programming block, "Pikachu the Movie Special!" And that's not all! Every weekday the network will be airing reruns of the most current series, Pocket Monsters Best Wishes! One episode a day Monday through Friday at 5:00pm and two episodes on Saturday evenings from 6:00pm. For more information search the Internet for Kids Station!
This week's guest is Kou'ichi Yamadera! "Ah! Oha!" he says, quoting his catchphrase greeting from his popular Oha! Suta kids' show. Let's get things started with the introductory rap!
Musashi and Kojirou talk about how fun that intro was as Nyarth re-introduces their guest as Yama-chan, also known as Kou'ichi Yamadera. Their guest is (at the time of this recording) one of the emcees on the morning kids' show Oha Suta and so he's been busy doing a little bit of everything right now! So they have a lot they want to ask him today, Nyarth says.
Musashi heard that something amazing happened to Mr. Yamadera lately...can you tell us what it is? Their guest responds that a little while ago -- June 17th, to be exact -- was his birthday! The Rocket trio all say Happy Birthday and then wonder...waitaminute, is that it? Mr. Yamadera adds that June 17th was the date when he got re-married for the first time! The trio laughs at the "first time" part of his remark; Musashi then goes on to tell anyone from the mainstream media listening to this show should use that "first time" comment for their breaking news stories.  Mr. Yamadera says he hopes they get properly compensated for such a scoop.
Musashi tells their guest that Yama-chan is someone they can't imagine not being a part of Pokémon. After all, there have been 15 Pocket Monsters movies so far and he's been in every. single. one of them! Mr. Yamadera notices he's always credited as a "Special Guest Voice Actor" even though he's actually been in every single film. So shouldn't he be considered a regular by now? After all, he's always right there with the rest of the cast so for all intents and purposes he should count as one of the members of the team, right? Musashi assures their guest that there's no ill will or anything like that and that everyone in the Pokémon world is nice and kind. Mr. Yamadera is about to say something -- it sounds like Ikuich -- but Musashi cuts him off, saying he doesn't need to get into all that. Everyone in the room laughs. Kojirou tries to steer the conversation in a different direction by loudly pointing out how hot the Studio is right now and so Mr. Yamadera picks up on this and says that yes, the Studio is a very warm and loving place.
After Mr. Yamadera slips up and refers to the Rocket trio as the actors' roles ("What are you talking about? My name is Musashi") he starts to talk about how he works with a different person in the Pokémon World each and every year. Who is he in charge for this year's 15th anniversary movie, Nyarth asks. Mr. Yamadera says he's in charge of Cobalion, the leader of the Three Swordsmen. He adds that it's actually been a while since he's been in charge of taking care a Pokémon because even though he's been a part of all 15 movies Cobalion is the first Pokémon he's taken care of since the Lugia in Movie 2. Put another way, everyone he's been dealing exclusively with humans from Movie 3 onwards!
Musashi remembers that oh yeah, Mr. Yamadera took care of Mew before he took care of Lugia. That's right; Mr Yamadera took care of Mew, then Lugia, and then a bunch of humans up until the Cobalion in this year's movie.
Musashi asks how taking charge of a Pokémon is different from taking charge of a human. With humans, he's been in charge of both villains and kindly old men alike, right? So how is it with Pokémon? Mr. Yamadera replies that there is indeed a difference when approaching humans vs. approaching Pokémon. Kojirou adds that he heard there are times when Mr. Yamadera will also take care of a Pokémon or two in movie in addition to whatever human character he's in charge of for that year. Musashi asks for some examples and...Mr. Yamadera can't seem to think of any...? But! He does remember taking care of a Kamonegi in the original Pocket Monsters TV series. Musashi asks their guests if he can bring it out and so he obliges. We soon hear a "Kamo kamo!" as Kamonegi enters the Studio.
A moment later we can hear Mew zipping around the Studio. "Mew Mew Mew!" Musashi tells the others to close all the entrances and exits of the Studio to keep it from escaping (something Kojirou mentions they do for every episode) but it seems like Mew uses its powers to Teleport away.
Musashi then says she knows that Mr. Yamadera's been involved in a ton of huge projects over the years; what is one that sticks out to him the most? Mr. Yamadera believes it's actually Mew, believe it or not. That's because with Mew, he had to make sure everyone understood what it was feeling even though all it could say was "Mew Mew" over and over. Lugia, on the other hand, was able to use Telepathy to communicate with Satoshi and the others in a language they can understand and so he didn't really feel like he was dealing with a Pokémon the same way he did with Kamonegi or Mew.
Aaron (from Pocket Monsters Advanced Generation The Movie "Mew and the Wave-Guiding Hero, Lucario") was also someone who stood out to him since there was a lot he had to convey to Lucario in that film. But they're all memorable in their own ways, he concludes.
The conversation then turns to Mr. Yamadera and his well-known affinity for mimicry. Nyarth points out that Mr. Yamadera's appeared in a bunch of TV specials about impersonations, with Kojirou adding that his impression of singer Yutaka Ozaki was particularly moving. Mr. Yamadera remembers winning the MVP award on the show Monomane Battle for that one back in 2004, but looking back on that performance he doesn't think he sounded all that much like him in the end. Musashi assures him that it was actually really good. In the CD version of the interview Mr. Yamadera starts to sing the first line of the chorus to Mr. Ozaki's song The Night of the 15th (15の夜), but for copyright reasons (probably) Mr. Yamadera's impromptu singing is played backwards.
But maybe some of the kids listening to this show wouldn't have remembered that...what's something he could do for them, right now, to show off his skills? Musashi remembers that their guest is supposed to be really good at imitating the vibration of a cell phone and so Mr. Yamadera starts to imitate a phone going off:
Musashi recalls how Mr. Yamadera likes to prank those in the Studio Village with that impersonation, making the other Day Care Workers scramble to check that it's not their cell phone disrupting the session.
Mr. Yamadera is also able to imitate a cuíca, a friction drum used a lot in Brazilian samba music, and a apito de samba, a "samba whistle." Mr. Yamadera starts to put on a one-man show:
How is he doing that, Musashi wonders. He puts his fingers in his mouth and moves his tongue really really fast? Mr. Yamadera says he's doing it with his uvula and demonstrates the difference in the sound made when he has his fingers up to his throat vs. when he doesn't. Mr. Yamadera says he's been praised by Brazilians in the past for his impersonation, telling him "Brazil no have man make music so nice," though the others wonder if there's maybe a more PC way he could be saying that.
Next, they bring up how Mr. Yamadera is known for imitating those crusty old speakers you find in elevators that tell you to "Please be careful of the closing doors. Please be careful of the closing doors." Musashi says she remembers hearing this impersonation in a stage play at some point as Nyarth observes that it seems like Mr. Yamadera is holding his breath when doing this one.
Last up, Mr. Yamadera imitates the sound of a dentist's drill. Kojirou had heard that there are some days when Mr. Yamadera can do this impersonation and some days when he can't, but luckily for them today seems to be one of the days he can:
It looks like they're all out of time for today! Musashi asks Yama-chan if he'd close out the show by promoting the most recent Pokémon movie, Pocket Monsters Best Wishes! The Movie "Kyurem vs. The Sacred Swordsman Keldeo" & "Meloetta's Dazzling Recital". Mr. Yamadera obliges:
Mr. Yamadera: "So you see, there's this Keldeo who wants to be one of the Three Swordsmen, right? How's he gonna grow throughout the movie? Huh? And how will Satoshi and Pikachu get involved? And I take care of Cobalion, the leader of the Three Swordsmen, right, and he has some really great lines. And that Cobalion, right, he has a bunch of lines that'll make you gasp, OK?"
Musashi: "But you can't say those now, right? You've gotta go to the theater to find out what those are."
Mr. Yamadera: "So make sure you go see it! I think this is a wonderful movie that'll stay with you the rest of your lives!
The Rocket trio thank their guest, Mr. Kou'ichi Yamadera, for coming into the Studio today.
The Battle Subway brothers Nobori (voiced by Kensuke Satou) and Kudari (voiced by Kiyotaka Furushima) talk about "Pokémon mate," a line of merchandise featuring chibi-fied versions of the characters from the video games Pocket Monsters Black & White.
There are file folders, clear stickers, and more! And starting from April, new tin badges, personal accessories, and other merchandise will be released, one after the other!
You can find Pokémon Mate merchandise in Animate stores across Japan, but that's not all! The Shinjuku, Ikebukuro, Akihabara, Shibuya, and Yokohama stores all have special display corners set up for Pokémon mate! Follow the traffic rules and head safely to your nearest Animate! Alllllllllllllll aboard!
Musashi excitedly announces that a new order's come from Double-Q! That's right, it's time for the The 'Orders from Double-Q - Try These New Items Out Ahead of Time' Segment!! Musashi seems really excited! There's no e-mail from Double-Q this time around so they just dive right in:
Waitaminute...that's not ice cream, it's rice cream...uh, I mean, it's just rice! Oh well, Musashi is happy to be eating food either way. One of her teammates shakes the package to produce a rattling sound as Nyarth starts to read the packaging. "Emergency Rations: Magic Rice. Non-Perishable." They have a lot of different flavors to choose from so he randomly picks up the miso flavored one first and starts reading. There are a number of ways you can eat this, it suggests. First, it says, you can serve it with either cold water or boiling hot water. But on top of that, the amount of water you add to it determines whether it turns into regular rice or into okayu, a sort of porridge made using rice. Kojirou picks up a nearby shrimp pilaf package and reads that if you fill the water up to the red line at the bottom you'll get pilaf, but if you fill it to the blue dotted line all the way at the top you''ll get risotto.
As mentioned before, they have a lot of flavors with them in the Studio today; white rice, Chinese fried rice, dry curry, beef bowl, shrimp pilaf, gomoku rice, and shiso wakame gohan. Musashi wants to eat all of them! Earlier they were talking about the two-in-one rice / okayu and the pilaf / risotto meal kits and so Musashi looks at the gomoku rice packet and notices that you can use it to either make regular gomoku rice or a porridge. Nyarth points out that certain noodle dishes will go by different names depending only on how soft or hard the noodles are and so it's not surprising that these rice dishes can go by different names depending on how much water is used to prepare them. Nyarth adds that if you find yourself in a survival situation where all you have access to is water then this will be a great product.
Let's get started! Nyarth tells Kojirou to try eating one of the rice packs now as-is, without any water or anything added to it. He eventually decides to go with the beef bowl flavor. Kojirou opens the packet and observes that it looks like the food's been freeze-dried. Musashi is surprised that the rice dish isn't brown; if it's a beef bowl then shouldn't there be some brown coloring in there somewhere? Nyarth clarifies that the rice itself is white but that there are little pieces of brown dried food in the bag that you can put on top that provide the beef flavoring. Anyway, Kojirou starts to crunch on the contents of the package. After a long while he reveals that the little bits of dried food in it have the feel of actual meat and that once you bite into them there's this strange burst of flavor. But up until you get to that point you wonder what it is you're actually eating.
Next it's time to try the curry flavored rice. It takes 15 minutes to cook this rice using boiling water and so they had some prepared beforehand in the interest of time. Kojirou adds that it takes 15 minutes to cook the rice dishes with boiling water but a whopping 60 minutes if you only have cold water. They have some of the gomoku rice made with cold water already prepared. Nyarth says that this gomoku one looks really delicious while Musashi marvels at how great it smells. Kojirou also has some risotto that was made beforehand. Nyarth picks up the risotto container and comments how much heavier it is than he thought it'd be; Musashi does the same and agrees.
Musashi helps herself to the dry curry rice. After a bit of lip smacking Musashi admits that it's hard to call this straight up "dry curry" but it does have hints of a curry-like flavor to it. It doesn't have that special kick to it, she adds. Adding even more water to the dry curry pack creates a risotto so Nyarth tells Musashi she should try that next to see how it compares to the regular dried curry; the only real difference between the two is the amount of water used to make it, after all. Meanwhile, Kojirou tells Nyarth to try the gomoku gohan made with cold water. After some more crunching and slurping Musashi says the dry curry taste that was in the one she tried before has been made a little bit weaker in this risotto she's having now. Nyarth also observes that the color of the risotto is a little darker than the dried curry rice. Musashi declares the risotto to be the tastier of the two.
So how's Nyarth liking his gomoku gohan made with cold water? The one that took an hour to make? After another pause Nyarth says it's a bit cold but it's still tasty. Musashi (apparently) tries some as well and is amazed at how flavorful it is. Kojirou suggests they try the dried beef bowl one he was eating, the one without any water added to it. Nyarth, in response, suggests he try the gomoku gohan. The Rocket trio swaps their food and takes turns eating each other's dishes.
Other than the taste, what does the trio think of these products? Musashi comments that if you have a regular sized plastic bottle then if you're out hiking somewhere you could fill up this packet, walk around for an hour, and then enjoy a nice little rice dish. Nyarth adds that it's not like you'd need a jumbo bottle or anything like that; a regular sized 140 mL plastic bottle should do the trick. If you opt to make the risotto you'll need 290 mL but even that's not all that much. Kojirou adds that the packages are light and therefore easy to carry. Musashi is amazed that there are people in this world who could think up such amazing things.
Nyarth cuts in to say that the water-less beef bowl Kojirou was eating is great as-is; you can eat it as if it was beef jerky or some other pub-type snack. Musashi agrees, saying that while you are supposed to serve these with water you can totally eat them without it. It's like a little rice snack...? Kojirou says some people prefer crunching on instant ramen without putting any water on it first because of how much stronger the flavor is. These rice packets are pretty similar.
In a section of the segment exclusive to the CD release, Nyarth mentions how the packets they have in the studio with them today have an expiration date of 2017. Kojirou points out that the packets have ziploc seals on them, prompting Musashi to observe that the three of them can sit there with one packet each, eating directly from the bag the way you see people eat directly from take-out Chinese food containers in American movies. Kojirou, meanwhile, tries out the dry curry. Musashi starts to talk about the white rice flavor, meanwhile, but is interrupted by Kojirou.
Kojirou says he was about to explain how the ziploc seal on these bags work when notices how the instructions on the package guides them to make sure to stir the rice well before eating. Um...whoops! Kojirou starts stirring one of the dishes and asks everyone to look at how much the color is changing. Musashi says that oh yeah, it does say that, but she was too busy wolfing hers down to notice. Musashi and Nyarth gather around Kojirou's gomoku rice and scream with pure joy as the color changes brown right before their eyes. They mix the other packets as well and then start to eat again. Nyarth and Musashi try the dry curry again and find that it's a whole lot better this time around! Mixing the rice makes a huge difference! Musashi said the dry curry was pretty weak before but it's perfectly fine now! Nyarth figures any problems they had with these was due to them not making them the right way.
Well, it seems like they're all out of time so it's time to play this week's song.
The song the trio's chosen this week is one of their own, Maemuki Rocket-Dan.
A 1 minute 31 second edit of the song plays.
It's time to bring this week's episode to a close! As Musashi continues to eat Kojirou reminds their listeners that the goal of this program is to recruit every single person into the Rocket-Dan. All you have to do is follow Sakaki-sama on Twitter...and that's it! Nyarth adds that once you become a member you can send them opinions, request Day Care Workers to appear in future episodes, voice opinions about what kinds of items they want the trio to try out, and more! Make sure to use the hashtag #Rocketdan!
Musashi, meanwhile, is in a great mood after eating so much just now. What a great episode! Nyarth says Musashi will be in charge of writing up the report this time around and she happily agrees. Kojirou and Nyarth sign off for the week as Musashi, who's fallen asleep after eating so much, snores her way through the outro. Until next time...Victory!!!
This radio program is brought to you by Kids Station and Movic.
"I'll have some more" Musashi says in her sleep...
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